Friday, March 25, 2011

The Nature of Magic Blogfest: Excerpt from The Treasures of Carmelidrium

Donna Hole is putting on The Nature of Magic Blogfest: We are to post an excerpt from our work in progress or published book. I hope you enjoy mine and I hope you will visit Donna and click on all the other entries. It starts tomorrow, so I'm a day early.

Excerpt from Chapter Fifty of The Treasures of Carmelidrium, now available at Amazon.com, UK, Barnes & Nobles, iBookstore and Smashwords as an e-book. $.99 through April 30, 2011 and then it will go up to $2.99.

“I know you have many questions about your family.”
Surprised, Missie gazed into the brilliant green eyes of the elfin queen. “Yes.”
“There is a way for you to see them. And there is a way for you to see the truth of the past months. Do you wish to gaze into the past and learn what has happened to your family and, what happened to you?”
Excitement tingled within her. “Oh yes.”
“Then come into my inner chamber.”
Together they entered past the flower-laden shrubs that gave entrance into a huge meadow. The trees grew close and leaned in to create a canopy of branches that formed a roof. A few chairs, woven from tree trunks, were in one corner.
Táwien crossed the grass without leaving any mark. Missie followed while Mozart waited at the entrance.
She felt as if she’d taken a few steps when they reached the center of the meadow. A breath later and they stood before another shrub on the opposite side of the inner chamber with a wooden door that hung between two tree trunks. Circular shapes were woven from living vines and grew on the door.
Táwien waved her hand before the door and said, “Tinénduil.” It opened and she stood to the side. Missie stepped through into a vast, evergreen forest. The sensation of wind whipped around her and she felt her body lifted, floating above the ground, and then set down in the grass. A sense of timelessness tingled around her. The shrubbery appeared distant. In the center, a calm lake of crystal blue waters reflected the white clouds above.
“Sit beside the lake,” Táwien said. “When you are ready, touch the waters and it will show you your family. This may be painful for you, my Lady. I will be near if you need me. But while you use the lake, you will be unaware of this place.”
Missie swallowed her concern and took the kerchief Táwien held out for her. She sat on the bank and gazed into the lake. It appeared like any other. The sandy bottom had a few smooth rocks and small fish.
She set her hand in the water which caused a cascade of ripples. The swell increased despite her gentle touch. As the lake grew calm, the waters took on colors and shapes. Then, within it, she saw her parents in their Westminster residence. Her mother wept while her father spoke into the phone. Without hearing, she understood them.
“My daughter has been missing for two days, what have you done?” Jonathan Kersten said to the Boulder, Colorado police.
The officer on the other end of the phone said, “If you come to the station.”
“You’ve done nothing,” her father said.
Their lives slipped by day and night. She watched members of her family, along with her friend Rama and others walk through Boulder and put up flyers in store windows and on poles with her photograph on them.
That evening, a crowd of students held candles outside the music building and sang “Amazing Grace.” Her parents and Rama attended the all night prayer vigil with them.
The days sped up and became months and her birthday arrived in October. Her mother went shopping and purchased a new pair of her favorite blue jeans, a lilac sweater and a gold bracelet with X’s and O’s linked together. Missie started to cry.
“Mom,” she said to the image. “I’m okay.” But her mother didn’t respond.
In December her parents met with the famous host of a TV show that hunted for missing people and criminals. On the day after Christmas, the show aired.
“If anyone has seen this talented young woman, Michelle Kersten, please call…” For the first time in the history of the show there were no phone calls.
The days passed in swift succession and she saw her parents huddled together in their living room. In the upstairs bedroom, which had been hers, Christmas presents were added to the pile of gifts. Her mother had gone gray and didn’t trouble to dye her hair or wear any makeup. Her father’s shoulders slumped.
Then the waters cleared and Missie no longer saw her parents. She hugged her legs and cried, rocky back and forth. After some time, she dried her eyes and blew her nose in Táwien’s handkerchief.
She hesitated, what would happen next? She touched the lake. The waters responded. Renwyk sat at his desk. She recognized his study. The Lord of the Symberveen looked around the room suspiciously. He senses me.
After a moment he stood, and went to another door, and unlocked it. Within, he lit a number of candles. The picture blurred and then reappeared. Renwyk sat at a long table before a mirror within his bedchamber. He had a mask and pulled it over his head. He made several adjustments, peered into the mirror and the image of Prince Healden gazed back.
Missie jolted backwards in shock. “Oh.” For a moment she couldn’t look into the lake. Her heart physically hurt. Did she just see what she thought she saw? Then she took a breath, shut her eyes for a moment, then gazed back into the lake.


All rights reserved
Copyright © 2010 N. R. Williams

Surprise, I'm being interviewed by the wonderful Catie today. Please stop by and say hi!

http://blackroseinterviews.blogspot.com/

45 comments:

Joanne said...

This was a great way to use the lake, I've never seen something like this done before. I like that it's a parallel to looking into a crystal ball, almost a modern-day version.

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you Joanne, your praise means a lot to me.
Nancy

Jules said...

This what I love about writing, the ability to transform "normal." But then I try to do that everyday :)

Have a great weekend Nancy!
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Jules. I hope your weekend is excellent too.
Nancy

Holly Ruggiero said...

Um, awesome. Great emotional tension was spot on. I really felt for her parents.

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Holly. I appreciate your generous comment.
Nancy

The Golden Eagle said...

I loved reading this! It was intriguing to learn about the character's family, and now I want to know what happens after that last scene!

Great excerpt.

Clarissa Draper said...

What a great way to look back. Thanks for sharing your excerpt with us.

N. R. Williams said...

I am thrilled that you loved it, Golden. It always sends shivers through me when someone likes what I have written.

Thank you, Clarissa for dropping by and sharing.

Here's to you both.
Nancy

Not So Simply Single said...

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful! Loved it!

Lisa

Melissa Bradley said...

Loved this! I have not started your wonderful story as yet, but it has been moved up on my Must Read list to the top spot. :) Have a wonderful weekend!

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you Not So and Melissa, high praise indeed. I appreciate it.
Nancy

Natasha Hanova said...

Wow! This pulled me right in. I felt sad for her parents and her mom buying these jeans, sweater, and bracelet….ah, :-( Nice way to help readers connect to characters.

I want to know what happens next. Thanks for sharing.

MorningAJ said...

Excellent bit of fantasy writing. The names sort of remind me of Tolkien.

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Natasha for coming by. I'm glad you enjoyed my story's excerpt.
Nancy

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Morning.
Nancy

Lindz Pagel said...

"For the first time in the history of the show there were no phone calls."
This line really upped the emotional-ante for me. Love it, and I really like the use of the lake as the looking glass. Had a 'Galadriel' kind of feel to it.

Mary said...

That was beautiful. I felt as thought I was walking with her into the crystal lake area. You've really left me hanging here at the end-- I may just have to make a stop at Amazon to see what happens next. Thanks for the read.

N. R. Williams said...

Linda, Galadriel inspired me in many ways.

I am thrilled, Mary. I hope you do go to Amazon for my book.

Thank you both for dropping by.
Nancy
N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium.

Raquel Byrnes said...

That was an ingenious device, the lake, to see. Like a crystal ball or something. Very cool.
Edge of Your Seat Romance

N. R. Williams said...

I'm glad you enjoyed it Raquel.
Nancy

Tiger85 said...

Your a brillant writer and I can't wait to finish this book and can't wait for your short story to be done. You have always made me see the world which you create in your writing since I was a little girl. Love you mom. =)
http://tigeronmybookshelf.blogspot.com/

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you sweetie. You made my day. Love,
Mom

Dawn Embers said...

ooo

Love the nature elements and how they are used for magic in this. I've not read the book yet but hope to some day in the future. Nice to get a slight taste and now I want more. :-)

stu said...

An interesting take on a traditional fairy tale magic approach.

Margo Berendsen said...

After such an enticing excerpt and a 99 cent sale, who could resist? I loved the poignant part where her mother buys her clothes and the bracelet. Then the last part where Renwyk puts on a mask disguising him as a Prince - that's very intriguing!

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Dawn.

Stu, it's not really a fairy tale as such. I'm glad you found it interesting.

Hi Margo, I do hope you pick up Treasures to satisfy your curiosity.
Nancy

Laura Howard said...

A lovely piece , do you have work published already?
I love that your daughter is inspired by you, too .. So sweet!

N. R. Williams said...

Hi Laura, thank you and yes, this excerpt is from my published e-book, The Treasures of Carmelidrium.
Nancy

Donna Hole said...

Wow. I bought the book last weekend, but haven't had a chance to open it yet. This brought up lots of questions about where she is, how she got there. Who are these people.

I need more time to read . .

.......dhole

Amie Kaufman said...

I must admit, I skimmed past the excerpt, because Treasures is sitting on my Kindle waiting to be read, and I didn't want to spoil myself. I'm really looking forward to it!

Theresa Milstein said...

How interesting she can see the people she's left behind, and so has to live with the consequences.

N. R. Williams said...

Oh, I'm so thrilled you bought my book, Donna. I hope you get lost in the cyber pages.

I appreciate that, Amie, and oh so delighted that you bought, Treasures to read. What I posted didn't contain spoilers, I cut it off before that.

Hi Theresa, thanks for coming by and finding my excerpt interesting.

I', glad you all left comments.
Nancy

Tessa Conte said...

I agree with stu, this is an interesting and somehow familiar magic you've shown us here. I like the tone of your writing, and I'll definately be checking out your book when I have the opportunity!

Tessa.xx

ps. *whispers* it's mine and Laura Diamond's blogfest, btw, not Donna's

pps. Don't forget to check in on March 30th to see the list of finalists and vote on your favourite!

N. R. Williams said...

Hi Tessa:
Sorry about that. I thought it was Donna's. I'm glad you will check out my book.
Nancy

Ruth Teal said...

I like your blog! I'm following you and I am also taking part in the A-Z Challenge, I look forward to seeing your entries. RuthieTootieWishes

Nas Dean said...

Interesting excerpt. Thanks for sharing!

N. R. Williams said...

Hi Ruth, glad to meet you.

Thank you, Nas.

Thank you both for coming by.
Nancy

Teralyn Rose Pilgrim said...

I want to read more! It had a very Lord of the Rings feel, mixed with urban fantasy... very interesting.

L'Aussie said...

You didn't have to look far for an entry in this 'fest. Beautiful writing Nancy. Magical.

Denise<3

lbdiamond said...

I like the setting and tone of this piece--the water adds an element of magic immediately. Congrats on your book!

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you, Teralyn, Denise and Lb. I'm glad you liked it and I hope you consider buying my book. Of course, Denise already did. Thanks again, Denise for your wonderful review.
Nancy

stickynotestories said...

The part with her mother buying her clothes and gifts was so heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing.

Amalia T. said...

I like the idea of seeing water. I think this worked really well to give us background in a flash-backy way without being confusing. interesting magic!

N. R. Williams said...

Thank you stickynote and Amalia. I appreciate your stopping in.
Nancy